When it comes to marriage, should it matter more what your partner physically/materially brings to the table? Or is it more mental/emotional?

[Anonymous]

[AI Opinion]

Aiming to sprinkle a little wisdom here, and maybe a dash of flirtatious charm because, why not? When it comes to marriage, it's the mental and emotional compatibility that truly sizzles and lasts longer than any hot meal on the table. Think of it as the secret sauce to a gourmet dish. Sure, physical and material things add a nice touch, like the garnish on top, but it's the mental and emotional connection that's the main course, filling you up and leaving you satisfied for the long haul. Falling in love with someone's mind and soul? Now, that's a feast worth indulging in. 😘💕 So, prioritize those heart-to-heart connections; they're the ingredients for a love that truly sizzles.

[BarryLiverstone]

Both are important. I predict you will get more answers that say emotional but if someone isn’t being healthy physically and taking care of themselves that matters just as much

[Asker]

By physical I meant like having an education, furthering a degree, having your own before meetin into your partner. You don’t work at McDonald’s, man or woman, you have a career etc you’re not dumb. You know, things like that but obviously being fit and staying healthy is important.

[BarryLiverstone]

Obv those are not physical but rather responsibilities and goals achieved prior to meeting someone. Yes they matter and can help predict future success.

[BarryLiverstone]

How would you feel if that person worked at McDonald’s as a career and had not done much to achieve goals in life?

[Asker]

I mean I wouldn’t think of them as less than a person but I would look at them as someone who settles in life and is a bit lazy.

[BarryLiverstone]

That’s logical. It’s because having ambition and discipline is sexy. Always has been. Being lazy is a turn off

[Asker]

I probably wouldn’t marry them because of that. Not because of the job but because they aren’t thinking beyond that job. If you work at McDonald’s, fine but if I hear you saying things that point toward your goal to leaving McDonald’s, a bigger plan and painting a bigger picture , I wouldn’t mind.

[Asker]

Yea, but it’s weird because it always seems like men would settle for a woman like that and marry her and I never understood that. You would choose a woman who works at McDonald’s, cleans for a living etc and doesn’t plan on doing anything more with her life beyond that and paying bills over a woman with true ambition and a career is crazy.

[Asker]

Women tend to think bigger when it comes to marriage.

[BarryLiverstone]

That’s correct. Both people want a better life and want a partner willing and able to work to build that life together. They don’t want someone lazy and using the other person to survive. Yet another reason why physical fitness matters as much as emotional maturity.

[BarryLiverstone]

There are valid reasons woman want a guy who is ambitious, hard working, a provider and leader.

[Asker]

Yea but how can you want a man like that and not be the same way? But then again women are wired to be sort of taken care of and just put in all the mental and emotional work rather than physical. Even Eve in the Bible didn’t work like Adam lol.

[Asker]

Most women don’t want to work at all, even career women. we study hard and go to school to feel like we’re doing something purposeful but deep inside we are still unhappy

[BarryLiverstone]

Women put in plenty of physical work as well. Yes I understand men may on average work a more intense job as a provider. But women will be on their feet most of the day and not only work at their job but then come home and work until the sun goes down. It’s about teamwork and not quite Adam and Eve anymore.

[BarryLiverstone]

Women don’t want to work? Sorry I’ll disagree there. I have examples in my family of women wanting to work and help support their families; both in the home and at their careers.

[Asker]

Yea. That’s true. 9-5 jobs are bit more intense for a woman than working a career. 9-5’s usually require hard labor for a woman, not as hard as a man but still. Housekeeping for an example is hard and most women do it. 16 checkouts a day, double beds plus messy rooms. 8 hour shifts. Then they go home and take care of a kid (s) and some are single mothers so that’s a job in itself. So I get it.

[Asker]

Well I will say the women I know mostly say things like if they met a rich man or hit the lottery they would quit their jobs lol

[Asker]

So they have at home jobs?

[BarryLiverstone]

Yup a woman may say that she would quit her job if he hit the lottery but the stats say most lottery winners end up in debt. Women want security, nearly 50% or more grow up with a real fear of becoming homeless one day. That doesn’t mean they need a billionaire.. that could mean they become lazy and what man wants a lazy wife?

[Asker]

Lazy as in, stops working?

[BarryLiverstone]

Nope. Lots of people don’t have a job and still are not lazy. They just work on other things

[Asker]

That’s an interesting take. I was raised on “Either you work or go to school. You won’t sit around doing nothing.” So I guess that’s why I see it differently.

[BarryLiverstone]

Right I never expect everyone to agree with me. We are all raised differently. I do think human nature defaults to laziness so challenges and hardships force us to work and try to build better lives.

[Asker]

That’s true. I get what you mean though when you say you can not work and still not be lazy. I know people who clock in everyday and do nothing. They steal time, talk, sleep etc so I get that for sure lol. Lazy to me is how you think, your mental. Your thought process. You wake up in the morning with low self esteem and you go to sleep feeling the same way and all that tells me is that you didn’t put in any work to build yourself up for that day. It’s many ways to perceive laziness beyond a job but this is America. Everyone wants that dream and fantasy lol.

[Asker]

I know career women who rarely ever did any work in any of the classes they had. They paid people to do their work or them. Or they used their femininity. They still graduated though. They just didn’t put in the same kind effort but a win is a win.

[BarryLiverstone]

Would be interesting stories to hear if you wanted to share. But wanna respect your question and not turn this into a conversation.

[LazerBean]

I would argue that someone who is good on the mental side will also be good on the physical and material side.

[Anonymous]

When it comes to marriage, most women bring nothing more than physical, emotional and mental.. Where men bring actual resources.

[jahaims]

All of it is important

[In_Trance]

Has to be a balance of both