If a woman baby-trapped the guy but things worked out and it's been 20+ years later, should she ever confess?

[Danielle93]

Sometimes it doesn't work out and the guy bails but in other cases, the man actually does marries her (unaware of what she did), they go on having another child or children and she dies with that secret. That must be why it's named baby-trapping.

I was reading a woman's story about how she did that to her then boyfriend of 5 years. She was tired of him delaying things with promises of ''one day we'll get married'', was scared to lose him and her fertile years if they never got married and didn't want any other man (both were virgins) that wasn't him. She didn't want to ever break-up, didn't want to start over nor have a child with another man she would then never love. Basically she wanted to keep him permanently. The couple are now in their mid-late 20's and have 3 children; 2 young men and a teenaged daughter. Their oldest son is 20-21 years old by now and the husband is unaware she deliberately planned that pregnancy by not taking birth control pills. The guy still thinks it's a baby from God, a miracle birth. The woman in the story feels terrible for what she did but has confirmed she'll take that to the grave.

I just found out my paternal grandma did with their first child too. She was tired of being a girlfriend after 4 years and wanted to have him forever. Grandpa only found out after her death, upon reading her old, diary.

[Chazmatazz269]

There’s an argument in favor of deception that i find interesting. It suggests that if you’re confessing to unburden yourself, but it burdens the person to whom you are confessing, then it is best to keep the secret. If the guy is obviously unhappy in the marriage because he only married out of obligation, then a confession is appropriate. But if he’s blissfully unaware of what she did, he should remain as such. I only pray that she’s riddled with guilt every moment of her life.

[Kaneki05]

Nah no point. That's just gonna lead to a pointless argument and even break up.

Whom does that benefit? Nor her, nor him. It's not a right thing to do but coming out about years upon years later for no gain is just dumb.

[Danielle93]

yeah certain things are better unsaid and taken to the grave

[Billlewis]

If a woman led me to believe that another guy's child was mine, I'd be thrilled if I found out later that it wasn't mine.

[Danielle93]

Nope. This is about a woman having your child without you having an consent nor saying into this. She gets pregnant on purpose (either by lying about taking pills or poking holes in condoms) in the hopes of getting a man to marry her. She's tired of being stuck as a man's girlfriend for years and worried that she'll run out of time to have kids.

[KrakenAttackin]

Pretty much all "accidental" pregnancies are the woman deciding to have a baby. Men know this.

[Danielle93]

It would be good if there was a solution for both genders. The solution for women to have kids within her timeframe and her not to worry about running out of time nor being kept as a girlfriend for years and years? The solution for men not to be baby-trapped? For everyone to be happy.

[KrakenAttackin]

@Danielle93. I agree 💯. I think this has been a problem since Adam walked up and said "Helloooo there Eve" 😎

[thisAppIsGarbage]

Yes. The murder suicide that follows is Devine providence

[Danielle93]

and then the children are left without parents, ruining their lives permanently.

[thisAppIsGarbage]

Aunt my kids. The fuck do I care heartless baby killer.

[slatyb]

No, she shouldn't. That's what therapists are for.