What do you think is a toxic trait in a relationship?

[Youngbrain]

Recently my cousin is having a real hard time with his girlfriend. They have been dating for 6 years she already met our family, and when we met her she was kind of shy but even after the years passes she didn't change with us well she didn't even try because she just didn't come anymore. They are still together and it wouldn't be a problem that she does come if they were just girlfriend and boyfriend but now they are fiancee because they were pushed to it by my uncle ( because for him my cousin is already too old) . But she still doesn't come to our family event even if my cousin come to all of hers she complains about having something to do every time once we even tried to changed the date for her but she still didn't come. But this is just the family part, with my cousin, when they figth about something she never apologizes despite her fault she always accuses him and when he tries to put some distance she calls him and say things like "I fell in the bathroom" or "I hurt my knee when falling from the bus" so my cousin always come back and come back.
Personnaly I think a relationship is a give and take interaction it doesn't work if it's only in one way so for me this is an exemple of a toxic relationship
What's your opinion?

[Hellraiser1984]

Coming from a child of a toxic relationship, anger and violence towards one of the other. Threats of violence especially towards the children and/or pets. Constantly being put down. One of them just goes to work and does nothing the rest of the time. One of the comes from a violent background ( except me because Im the exact opposite of my father). Harassment of the children.

[Gigerpimp]

Anything to do with there cell phone like as soo. As they start messing with ur phone it's a done deal

[TrueConfection]

I think you're right. Trying to separate someone from their family is a toxic trait. It sounds like your cousin is doing a good job of not allowing her to stop him from his own family gatherings. I think the best thing your family can do is keep letting him know how happy you are that he came instead of telling him how disappointed you are that she didn't come with him.

[Missylynn]

I think there’s two sides to a story and you only hear your cousins side who probably doesn’t tell you everything. Don’t judge

[Youngbrain]

I guess I'm a bit biased I won't lie😅

[Blazingfang]

Being in a relationship thinking "i want him/her to make me happy". If everyone just tought "i want to make him/her happy" the world would be a better place.

Loving someone is to care for the person. Sure, if you are the only one doing it, just break up. Dont turn it toxic in return.

Caring for the other is the best thing in the world when both think the same.

Only caring for owerselves is the toxic trait.

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[getwiththepg]

Holy shit

[NathanDavis]

being selfish is the root of a lot bad traits...

[TenderFantasy]

Being judgmental and CRITICAL/UNACCEPTING of your partner as if you're better than them. Also what a lot of others have mentioned. There's a lot unfortunately.

[laly520]

lying
gaslighting
selfishness
egocentric behaviour

[aceleon]

i just learned i was a half toxic person since the later 2 describes me perfectly, gaslighting? they say i am a manipulative person by nature but do i gaslight people? i really don't know.
i guess my only redeemable trait here is my brutal honesty, some of my friends calls it savageness but i like to think i am not that much.

[laly520]

@aceleon it isn't an issue or big deal to be brutal honest but gaslighting others is a big problem
its bascially when u make other person believe into sth untrue or mislead em makign em thinking differently than how they r supposed to be
for example
person1: I think u r gaslighting me
person2: gaslighting? there is no such word, its made up

[Squatting_Slav]

I wouldn't even say things like reassurance and jealousy that's all part an parcel.

In my experience it all starts from not being able to love unconditionally

[KittygosMeoWW]

I think someone who is controlling, brings up stuff they know about you that’s private, and buys stuff for you and then brings it up when they’re mad is toxic

[fantasticass]

She is very selfish and self centered. I'd call her a psycho narcissistic cunt.

[Anonymous]

Trying to be "equal" in everything rather than doing what works best.

[KrakenAttackin]

She is a classic cunt.

[fantasticass]

Agree 💯%

[Francesca1994_]

Controlling people.