Cheaters, why did/do you cheat?

[clampfan101]

This is for everyone who has ever cheated at least once in their life. Not just people who do it regularly.
Also, do you regret doing it?

Updates

+1 y

Why cheat rather than break up and start a new relationship?

[imxaxmuffin]

It just happened.

A friend of mine, who was really attractive and I genuinely liked as a person, was into me. I didn't have feelings for him and he knew I was in a relationship, but one day we were hanging out and he just put me under a spell with his smoothness and knowledge of what to do, by the time I realized what we were doing it was kinda too late, luckily we didn't have a condom and that's when I actually realized what I just did, so we didn't fuck, but we did fool around. I didn't have any intention to do that when we were hanging out, but I wish I would have listened to my boyfriend when he 'warned me' about my friend. Never told my boyfriend, 5 years later and we're still together and that was the only time anything happened with someone else and my friendship with dude ended that day.

[LynnShanice]

I have cheated because I was hurt and wanted someone else to make it better. In the end I was honest about it and told him. I don't regret it. However, I did learn from it. I realized that I was wrong and shouldn't have done it. No matter how bad someone treats you, it does not give you the upper hand to treat them badly. You don't have to stoop to their level. They'll get what's coming to them in the long run. #Karma

[clampfan101]

I’m glad you learned.

[ScottL]

So, if you ran to someone else when you were feeling hurt, I know you say you learned from that, but what will happen next time you get hurt in a relationship? Will you go to someone else for comfort line you did the last time? Or what will you do instead?

[ScottL]

... like** you did...

[LynnShanice]

No, instead I will pray and put my faith in God. If the situation still does not change, I will leave.

[Anonymous]

Apparently I cheated, I met this guy online and we only knew each other for a week online, we had never met and I went out on a few dates with a guy in real life. The guy online said I had cheated on him even though he'd never even asked me to be his girlfriend. I didn't take the kind of online relationship as serious. I met the online guy a year later and we were dating and he still see'd that as cheating.

[chris1984]

one off. start of a new relationship with emotional ties to my ex. ex and i met up for drinks "as friends" and it all led to being drink and fucking.

i regret it every day. not only was it crappy sex and cemented all the reasons why we had broken up in the first place, it damaged my new relationship.

[MarshallAllister]

People cheat, but always have reasons, and it the end the reasons don't matter. You're alone with your actions, and it's not the over controlling boyfriend or the tease girlfriend that forced you to negate your own integrity.

[clampfan101]

It’s sad how few people realize it’s futile.

[Anonymous]

Hard to describe... I felt very attracted to the guy and didn't quite understand why I didn't feel like this for my boyfriend... it took a while until I fully realised that I didn't love my boyfriend anymore and that he was in fact emotionally very abusive.
That's not an excuse of course - but it really messed with my brain and the way I viewed things.

In the end I broke up, didn't want to live as a cheater (well, I can't undo it, but I can make sure not to do it again)

[clampfan101]

It’s understandable if you didn’t realize it.

[kenjaminSlutton718]

Still a whore

[darrinp1]

Sad reality of dating you're not married so if you find someone else better all the more better problems today's society they quit dating with marriage marriage is something you should stay with dating until you find the best person available for marriage

[kenjaminSlutton718]

Okay so they should be single and fuck multiple people if you wanna fuck around don’t be surprised if the wrong guy shoots you and your lover and puts you under concrete somewhere just a thought...

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks for your understanding - I have to say, I'm not proud of it. But it taught me a lot about love and life itself. And as weird as it sounds, that experience actually led to me stopping two people from cheating because they were in the same position. I don't think that makes up for it and I still consider cheating really bad - but I can say that I learned my lesson.

[Opinion Owner]

@kenjaminSlutton718 More of a slut, actually. Whores get paid. But I agree, it wasn't honourable at all.

[Anonymous]

I did it as my boyfriend at the time was controlling. I mean would call me a drunken whore if I wore makeup, skirts/dresses or even leggings. Would expect me in by 11 or we'd argue. He would guilt trip me about picking up shifts. Yet if I tried end it he'd flip out, threaten to kill himself. Think he liked the control thinking back

[clampfan101]

Why didn’t you just dump him and start a new relationship?

[GrahamElliott]

Yeah, no shit.

[guilly18butnot]

Yes. In both sides (males and females) the main reason to cheat is usually a dissatisfaction with the partner. And dissatisfaction plays in many leagues, not only the sexual, and usually it is more often a reason for cheating the emotional disconnection rather than the lack of sexual compatibility (which often comes with it, anyway).

I understand why you did it as I've been there, even though I consider myself a very faithful person. Usually immaturity leads us to looking for a solution to our pain via finding external actors that mitigate our troubles, and most of the times although it leads to sexual intercourse it has an emotional reason all in all.

Don't worry, but just don't learn from it. Never do to someone what you wouldn't want for you. Through experience you will realize that it is better to break up rather than to cheat, even if the break up comes from the fact that you have found another soul you fancy.

[clampfan101]

@guilly18butnot Well said.

[Opinion Owner]

As I said, every time I tried he'd put on the waterworks and threaten to kill himself. And when you have depression you don't want that threat hanging over you.
But since then haven't done it again, been 7 years.

[Anonymous]

I don't regret at all. She didn't treat me with nurturing care, tought she was too pretty, when she was jealous instead of talking to me she got really bitchy and annoying to create a fight about other stuff but never admitted she was jealous. But the biggest thing was when she lied about her plans. I found out and cheated her big time. Best decision I have ever made, altough it was very hard because it was the first time I cheated on someone.

[clampfan101]

Why not dump her if you didn’t get along anymore?

[Opinion Owner]

Have you ever heard of women that can't dump the man even being spanked? That was the case my friend, you are too attached. Eventually I told her, but even this sign of honesty she was not worthy.

[BrittBratt2416]

never cheated, don't see the point. Don't get in relationship if you don't want to stay committed to one person is my moto.

[Anonymous]

I was young and had just moved to a new city and new no one. I was very insecure and dated this manipulative girl that tried to control every aspect of my life. From whether I chose to drink when we went out to whether I wore glasses or contacts. It was bad because all my friends were people I met through her. She would start a fight if she didn't get her way. I was too insecure to break up with her. So, when she would fuck with me I would cheat on her just to get even.

[clampfan101]

How did the relationship end?

[Opinion Owner]

Her cheating on me with her now husband of 26 years. We're good friends today ironically. We both grew up.

[Squeeek]

I tried to break up with my ex, but he wanted to hold on. He knew I wasn’t happy, but thought time and “love” could fix us. Eventually I met someone who made me smile again, but tried to put distance between me and my ex. I cheated, but felt horrible, because I knew it would hurt him so much. In the end he left me, but still came back wanting to work things out. I chose not to.

[darrinp1]

For women is emotional connection even though they have cheated for the physical traits most men cheat because physical non emotional issues

[Jayson101]

Are you sure? I was so in love

[Chasesullivan]

I used to be a cheater but the reason I cheated was because I didn't feel connected to the girl I was with

[clampfan101]

Sometimes people simply choose the wrong person and need to look for a new, stronger connection after parting ways.

[loveyou34]

When she talked to other guys behind my back I knew that I couldnt trust her so I talked to other girls too as a revenge. She cheated on me eventually.
I've been a caring and loyal boyfriend my whole life but what I got was those craps. I simply want to commit to someone and I hate changes.
I guess now I shouldn't take relationships serious anymore. Just hang out have fun and hookup

[guilly18butnot]

I understand you feelings, and I'm 42. This has happened to me over my life experience in several occasions. And I tended to react as you did, although mostly I was still loyal since just flirting made me feel better.

We certain types of conservative, romantic males, have been tought that females are princesses who commit to the relationship and it is us males who are the usual cheaters. That's an old fashioned view. And part of our delusion comes from this conservative education that did not take in account the reality of sexuality in the western society.

We should not be puzzled by women enjoying their sexuality as much as we do, as we were tought the princess tale. It is really hurtful and takes time to realize that women and men are very much alike in their sexual views, although approaches might differ. And as such, it takes time to realize that due to that sexual reality, there are weak women, bad women, unfailthful women, and wonderful women. And all of that can vary overtime.

[clampfan101]

Revenge is never the right choice. And there are plenty of women you could find peace with if you keep looking. Don’t give up and stay a sexoholic.

[loveyou34]

@guilly18butnot pretty women are most likely unfaithful. It really sucks. I wish that I could date not-so-goodlooking girls but I can't

[guilly18butnot]

"pretty women are most likely unfaithful", well it is probably true, as much as good looking men are too. But beware that average or ugly women who recieve in a moment in their lives the proper flirting can become cheaters as well, overmore that is more common in men.

Being a cheater or not is not a matter of beauty. Both good looking and below average looking people experience sexuality and hence have sexual needs. Immaturity or lack of experience is a boost for cheating, and trust me that all those super-hot women you think of, even if they had their period of manipulation (which some do, as men) will reach a point in which they might be able to separate sexuality from real affection, even though both are somehow related.

You are young, and at your age I had the same impression. I'm not ugly, actually I was quite good at the art of seduction but always considered myself loyal if in a relationship. But when young, I realized that such goal was pretty difficult. I continue next.

[guilly18butnot]

I realized (after many years) that my sexuality distorted the reality around me, despite being a conservative prince looking for a princess.

Best way to overcome the topic of pretty women are more unfaithful, is understanding their sexuality as if it were ours, and therefore the way they use their advantages and because they are immature how they commint cheating or have behaviours we wouldn't want for ourselves. We have to jump into their shous with sincerity to realize how evident it is that their sexual lifes (those of the good looking) will be more abundant, and hence their sentimental lifes and their mistakes.

If a super hot woman is still a "bitch" by her 30's, then keep away from her. She will most likely end up unhappy and unsatisfied, whilst using her beauty as a weapon of mass destruction. But we males with certain age are dominant over these sort of women (mostly, not always) and we are in control. And overmore, we don't want them but for an occasional shag.

[Lumberman53]

I'm not a cheater but those who are usually discontent with the relationship but find a comfort in staying with their partner

[CapitanAlex]

You dont know if at the end you'll be with that actual couple, so why lose time?

[MrMAC777]

I was cheated on, and my love for her died that moment. I cheated for revenge a few times and it felt great. No regrets.

[herecomesdehzao]

Great.

[clampfan101]

There’s no need for revenge if you break up.

[herecomesdehzao]

Of course there is. The hurted self respect needs its closure

[pink1980]

Life isn’t black and white.

[clampfan101]

Did I say it was?

[ScottL]

What's that suppose to mean? If you were in a committed relationship and you "messed around" with someone else during that time... That's considered cheating... Sounds pretty black and white to me

Please explain your opinion of that.

[pink1980]

I haven’t messed around. I’m in a committed relationship.

I won’t explain myself to a man that’s already made up his mind. I’m going to assume based off your harsh response you’ve been cheated on.

[clampfan101]

@ScottL People cheat for different reasons.

[ScottL]

If you haven't messed around with someone while in a committed relationship, then you didn't cheat on them. Maybe did something else, but not cheating.

You don't need to explain yourself, and honestly I don't care, but my reply to your comment was about you saying cheating isn't black and white...

Yes @clampfan101, people cheat for different reasons, but every one of those reasons ended in someone messing around with someone other than their SO. So, it's still black and white.

By "messing around", I mean it could be anything from casual kissing to sex.

[Anonymous]

I just like dick and my boyfriend wasn't giving me any

[clampfan101]

So you’re just “in it for the money” when it comes to relationships?

[Opinion Owner]

Im in it for the dick

[guilly18butnot]

sounds fair but, regarding the fact that you considered that important, why not just leave him and not play with his feelings?

afterall, when you decide to be in a relationship trust and sincerity is a must, so if he did not cover your needs, why make him go through the cheating? Unless you find the act of cheating exciting, which sometimes happens.

My recommendation, if your partner is not good in beed to your expectations, don't cheat, break up. Don't be a coward. And be both sincere (tell him about your dissatisfaction) and gentle (no need to tell him by making him feel like shit, because if you do that, he will turn into and even worse lover).

[guilly18butnot]

shit, my spelling sucks...

[clampfan101]

It’s a figure of speech. (Hence the quotes) I wasn’t talking about actual cash. And if that’s all you want, you’re not ready for a real relationship. Just things like friends with benefits that you can leave whenever you want instead of cheating.

[Justin85283]

How often did you seek new dick?

[Justin85283]

How many one night stands have you done?

[guilly18butnot]

are you guys touching yourselves?

because a lady liking dick is not a new thing

[DesiBeautyLover]

I wanted to pass my classes

[Mounirkhiro]

Never ever