I asked a guy out for my friend and now she’s upset?

[Anonymous]

My friend lives in a bubble. Very quiet and shy, doesn’t talk to anyone, celibate, won’t get laid, doesn’t go on dates often despite being very pretty, when she does go on dates she always waits for the guy to ask, etc so actually she lives in THREE bubbles: a social bubble, a dating bubble and a sex bubble. She asked me for help with socializing as she’s very uptight and doesn’t know how to talk to people. She’s been trying and improving but I think she would improve a lot more if she was actively dating, meeting men and getting laid (not to be a bitch or a bad friend but the girl could really use a good lay whether she admits it or not). So I’ve taken over all three issues and have gotten nothing but kick back from her.

My dating style is different. I match with guys, I don’t waste time on dates. I make it clear I’m attracted on day one, meet within a week, fuck on the third date and commit on the fourth. I’m 43, she’s 41 so neither of us has any time to waste. I’m more of the dating “cheetah” type while she’s the dating “caterpillar” type (she basically moves an inch per week with dating). I love her, but she fucking kills me with this “I’m not rushing” shit. I’m just like “you’re 41 and single. Rushing is your only option”. She’s been going on dates more (because I have my foot up her ass pushing her). So today she matches with a really cute guy on okcupid. He tells her she’s cute and she says it back (which I say “good girl”). Then she hands me her phone to show me his response. I did something with out her permission and typed “we’re attracted to each other. No more bullshit, let’s meet for drinks!” I hand it back to her and the guy responds “you seem like a good girl. I can change that”. Then she says she doesn’t need corrupting. She blocked the guy and now she’s mad at me for saying that. I’m only trying to help her. Am I the asshole?

Updates

2 d

Add to this, I have to coach her how to talk to men because she’s mean to them when they show attraction to her or try to be romantic. I try to help her with how to dress and do her hair for dates because she thinks it’s acceptable to show up for a date in jeans and a t-shirt with her hair pulled back in a ponytail and no make up on. When she tells me that she has a date, I ask what day and time and I come over that morning to help her pick an outfit and make sure she does her hair.

[OlderAndWiser]

Oh, the good intentions paving company is on the job!

Why don't you suggest a few double dates with you and your current guy so she can get an up close look at how dating works for other people? Maybe she doesn't want to fuck on the third date but could still learn some other things from watching you with your guy.

[Asker]

I might try that. Thanks.

[OlderAndWiser]

Good luck!

[Part2603]

Sounds like you're doing necessary intervention.

[Asker]

Yeah I am. She’s uptight and REALLY needs to get a good hard lay no matter how much she denies it or tries to fight me on it. Yes I’m being pushy, but she needs pushing. And believe me, she has guys lining up to fuck her so they’ll be thankful for her “corruption” too.

[Asker]

So yes, I’m intentionally making her look “easy”

[Part2603]

You might as well. She is running out (already has) of time.

[Asker]

EXACTLY! Something a lot of women don’t accept is that we need to have a man in our lives, myself included until I was 37 (yes I admit that I was 7 years out of time too). What worked for me was having a friend do the same thing I’m doing. Her exact words to me on a night out were “i’m going to put my foot up your ass to make sure you dress in a sexy outfit and get laid tonight”. I listened to get her off my back, met a guy that night, got laid, loved it and the guy and myself were married within a year, we still are. Yes I had to whore myself to find love, but it was worth it. I wouldn’t have found love if I retained a backwards view about sex.

My friend’s problem is she thinks she doesn’t need to have a man in her life. She thinks she can just be single and do her thing, but women really shouldn’t be single, especially after 30. I fucked up, but I rectified it. She refuses to even think she fucked up. I’m not giving up until she gets laid or gets into a relationship.

[DishLady]

So basically you f-ed with her modest approach to dating.

She was right to block him. She's got more horse sense than you do.

Yes, in this instance, particularly given how old you are, you're being an ass and should have known better. Don't project your values onto other people.

[Anonymous]

You're both daffy as hell. And yes you did the wrong thing. Because that guy was trash. Maybe she does need a roll. But that's NOT your decision to make.

[Twalli]

Honestly I think he is. That's not really respectful.

[Danny_dan92]

You aren’t your friend

[RedInnocent69]

Not at all, but she’s not where you are…

[Asker]

She’s not. I’m trying to get her there but all I’m getting is kickback from her.

[RedInnocent69]

She might never get there. What’s her deal? Why is she single?

[Asker]

Because she doesn’t want to get out of her shell and refuses to have sex.

[RedInnocent69]

She’s missing out, but what are you going do? 🤷‍♂️

[Asker]

Keep pushing. That’s what I’m going to do. The good girl image is cute at 20. When you’re in your 40s and still single, it’s not cute anymore. It’s pathetic.