I am curious. How does a guy find the right women to talk to? Do I just need to give people more of a chance or something? Am I being too pessimistic?

[WhiteBoyChill]

I’ll admit I don’t try very often when it comes to women in life.

Its not that I’m this super unattractive guy or that I lack self confidence or anything major like that.

Its more so just that I tend not to feel attraction to very many women at all in general, and the few that I do come across usually tend to have boyfriends (and they’re not just saying that either, I’ve met their boyfriends personally)

So obviously at that point you just gotta leave em be out of respect if they’re already committed somewhere.

There was this one Russian girl I was pretty friendly with though at University, and I was good friends with her boyfriend as well. We could pretty much talk about anything. It was super cool.

I met a french girl once too that had to have probably been at least a solid 9/10, only met her a couple of times though, but supposedly she goes to parties every week with guys she meets on Tinder, so not really a big loss on my part after all lol.

But that’s about as far as I’ve gotten with women at my University in two years though 😂

Only one girl I’d regularly talk to but perhaps you could count the church girls I also briefly talked to as well. They were all nice, but I guess I just didn’t feel strongly enough about them to consider pursuing, I felt indifferent to them. Though maybe I should have given them more of a chance.

I’m just waiting for that girl I feel really strongly about when I first meet her but perhaps that’s just not realistic.

Maybe my problem is just that I don’t give things enough time so I can’t form as meaningful connections with people.

I’m an Engineering student so most of the time its just me being busy and stressing out about stuff but every now and then a couple times a week I do go on outings with my guy friends.

But seriously though, ever since I’ve joined this site, I’ve met all sorts of women on here that actually seemed like decent people. Maybe the internet is deceiving, or maybe women aren’t as bad as I think they are.

[Sanser]

You have to try to be more open, I was like you, I used to not feel atraction to no one and the ones I felt something just had a partner. I really recomend you to talk to all women, you can feel like you are a perv or something like that for only aproaching women but no, this is only to know more girls. If you are friendly they will be friendly and in some point you will meet the girl of your dreams. Try not to be closed and just enjoy socializing. Be flirty with pretty girls even if you dont feel atracted. At some point you will find the best for you :D

[WhiteBoyChill]

I don't know man its just I really do feel pessimistic though. Maybe I’m overjudgemental but I feel most women just aren’t desirable and that’s part of what makes it difficult

[Sanser]

I understand you, I really do but you must do the effort or you will end up alone... Im not being extreme with this but I know 30+ yo who are still alone and never had a girlfriend because what you said. You must do the effor and be proactive and in some months you won't feel that lack of desire, trust me.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Nah man its just I really do feel as though it must be a force. I tend to have little patience in general and it just gives me a headache thinking about how much aggravation its likely going to take.

[Drewtate]

If you've worked on yourself like your in shape athletic/muscular, making good money, well groomed, dress well and drive a good car then good women find you. Of course they act like you the one asking them out but in reality they know who you be and they've purposefully put themselves on your path. So you may find them at church, at the gym, at work etc.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Well I’m not really muscular or rich yet, but either way there are still plenty of guys that are neither muscular nor rich that have gfs

[alice55]

I think that if you don't feel a connection to the women you met you shouldn't force yourself (it usually end badly and our first feeling are usually right). You're still young you have time, I think you just need to go to your own rhythm and not stress. I'm sure you'll meet someone good when the right tome will come.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Yeah, I mean at the same time though I feel like now might be my best chance of meeting someone though. I might not have the same opportunities later

[alice55]

Possible so you can try meeting some people, in France we meet people through coworker and / or mutual friends (its safer than meeting stranger and at least you have a vague idea of what they're like). Might be a good idea to meet some women though common friend or something

[petitedollbabee]

You miss 100% of the chances that you never take. If you’re barely approaching women or talking to them, then ofcourse you’re going to find no one. Rejection is never a good reason to give up on searching. Obviously don’t keep pestering the same girl after she’s said no, though.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Its more just like it seems like an effort not worth making, but with the right person it would have been an effort worth making

[petitedollbabee]

How will you know when you’ve met the right person if you’re barely interacting with anyone?

[WhiteBoyChill]

Wouldn’t I feel attracted to them if they were the right person?

[petitedollbabee]

That depends. Are you basing that attraction only on their appearance? How will you know if you’re attracted to who they are if you don’t talk to them?

[WhiteBoyChill]

If I walk into a concert, I will see hundreds of pretty girls in one day. That is of secondary importance to me.

Its more so just that certain women seem unapproachable, or they just spend their time hanging around guys I don’t like, and that makes me not want to talk to them.

[petitedollbabee]

I see, that’s fair enough.