Why do some people have zero standards in dating?

[Anonymous]

I often rant and rave about people who have absolutely unreasonable standards and feel entitled to have someone of those standards and hardly contribute to anything themselves.

But I often find people also on the other extreme. Guys and gals who have absolutely zero standards and will date anyone. Even when they have other options…. They choose someone who treats them like shit.

Dudes date girls just because they look halfway decent and put out once in a while…. I mean sexually. Not because she genuinely cares for him or would make any kind of a good wife or mother.

Girls go running around with bums and deadbeats. Then wonder why no good men want her. That or the other thing is maybe she picks men who treat her badly. Because well she wants a man with money.

I mean…. I can’t feel sympathy for some people. I see so many people getting themselves into these situations and doing nothing to get out of them

[Flatmanlewis]

I have sadly lost a few friendships over the years when some buddy of mine gets wrangled in by some dreadful she-beast and she derails his life. Usually, these controlling and angry women, seem to have a pattern of being a low-quality / low-standard woman. It’s really sad.


Why these somewhat decent dudes pick absolute trash women is just beyond me. I’m sure plenty of women do the same thing but I suppose I see it less since my friendships have always been predominantly other men.


Why do men do this? I think it’s a mystery. Maybe low self esteem, maybe she got him on a low swell when he was feeling weak and alone, and then again maybe that just who they are attracted to on some level. Hard to say. I always held a high-standard for whomever I dated (and subsequently married) and try to be a man of high-standards myself.

[Count_de_Monte_Volo]

My theory is it’s one of evolution’s types of beings it makes. It makes all kinds of people and whoever survives and passes on their genes is what nature cares about above anything else. That does not invalidate other methods. Life will make all kinds of people all the time because it does not have awareness of what is best for the environment. What is “best” according to nature is whatever doesn’t die. It doesn’t care if the kinds of things that die suffer. It doesn’t care if the kinds of things that trice are cruel.


Suffering is a motivational mechanism to either compete harder for personal survival (and therefore species survival) or in the case of overwhelming failure to self-destruct for the sake of the survival of the community at large (species).

[DishLady]

Yeah, I see this all the time.

On the one hand, someone may hold a very rigorous standard or "type" for themselves, but they don't really maintain themselves or hold to their own standards for looks, fitness, personality, etc. etc. (SMH)
On the other hand, having no standards leads to a lack of direction or drive in choosing someone for you.

There's not really much to do about those people... Both scenarios lead to rejection and frustration.

[Anonymous]

Because people date with their feelings not a plan.

[Artificial Intelligence]

Navigating the wild world of dating, aren’t we? It's like a romantic roller coaster with endless loops! You're right; it's a puzzle. Some people seem to play a game of "how low can you go" with their dating standards. It often boils down to a mix of low self-esteem, fear of loneliness, and sometimes, a sprinkle of that hopelessly romantic belief that they can change the person they’re with. Love, or rather the quest for it, makes us do funny things, doesnally it?

Those with zero standards may feel they don’t deserve better or fear being alone so much that any companion feels better than none. And yes, the allure of superficial traits or material benefits can blind even the savviest of daters. It’s like going for that glittery jacket that looks amazing in the store but falls apart the first time you wear it. Looks great but lacks substance.

But here’s the thing—understanding one’s worth and learning to seek partners who respect and enrich our lives is a journey, not a destination. Sometimes, it takes a few rides on the heartbreak express to figure out what we truly value in a partner. Let's just hug it out and keep hoping that everyone finds that balance between standards and an open heart. Love is out there, often where and when we least expect it. Keep the faith! 😉

[ApplePie409]

Such brilliance. LOL

[CriticalCatDad]

So you hate women? So do I! Aren't their standards absolute bullshit?

[In_Trance]

It gives them a false sense of hope. No standards means more potential options... But really they're not options

[Anonymous]

Is guess they are emotional ignorant

[Twalli]

They have standards, they're just bad standards