Hey girls and guys, I am together with my girlfriend for a month now. I feel like she is not doing anything to hold this relationship up.
For example its always me kissing her, its always me making up a meeting. Is she maybe too shy or just doesn't wanna have a relationship with me. Obviously this insecures me a lot as I feel like an idiot giving the love and not getting it back! Should I talk to her about? If yes what should I say? Or should I break up with her? Thx for your help in advance!
Oh geez no, don't break up with her! Trust me she's probably just as crazy about you as you are about her, like you said she's probably just shy. I know I'm exactly like her at the begining of the relationship, maybe throughout the whole relationship actually. In my mind I'm always thinking, "If I'm always asking to do things, or am always the one making plans, or being affectionate, than he's going to think I'm clingy and Ill end up driving him away.Ill just let him initate, that way I know HE wants to" I know its not right to feel that way but it's what I continually do. Maybe she's like me, maybe she feels the same way I do.
So it probably has nothing to do with you so don't feel insecure about it. But I feel that if it is really bothering you then you should bring it up. The last thing to do is bottle up feelings. In my last relationship I was like her the entire time, I'm starting to think that could be why it ended, I can see how frustrating it can be.Sorry I just had a little epiphany. Try to bring the topic up with her gently but not right away give her time to become more comfortable with you. Who knows, maybe things will change. But let her know that she can be comfortable with you and that there's no rush.if she feels obligated it may scare her away because you can't force people to feel comfortable. Give it time, but if you feel that its impossible, don't string her along, from experience, I know that hurts. Good luck with everything, I hope it all works out!
no don't break up with her. I'm pretty sure, as I'm a bit the same, that she is just protecting herself. She doesn't want to give 'all of herself' or express all her feelings yet because she's probably worried she'll scare you away. She wants to take it slowly, to see that you really like her, and work out her own feelings before she starts expressing her own. I know it can be annoying for you, especially if she's not giving you anything, but it's only been a month and the fact that she's doing this shows she likes you a lot, because she doesn't want to wreck anything.
I think leave it go a while, but definitely talk to her about how you feel, make sure you keep letting her know how much you want to be with her, but don't rush her, or make her feel like she HAS to start doing more, otherwise she'll feel like she's not good enough for you, because I'm sure she feels like she's showing you enough.
After awhile however if it keeps going, one person putting in all the effort is tiresome and hurtful, so yea if she doesn't start showing you anything after say 3 months, then a serious chat may need to occur. Because if someone likes you, then eventually they'll let their guard down, and once that happens, naturally she'll start expressing how she feels with everything she has.
i was in the same situation at the beginning of my relationship. I was so mad about it. but I just got used to it, and now I really don't mind it at all cause now I never have to turn down my girlfriend, and that's a good thing
hey men if it was me I would take her out to a dinner, and almost at the end talk to her about it.gotta worn you a small percent of the girls that goes through something like this ( dinner and all the other stuff ) , break up, but the other they just think about it ( without taking a break ) and they could turn out to be a pleasure!. 1 out of 5 girls break up.had little bit of experience!
True love should be unconditional; that is you should not expect anything in return. I think you know yourself best and should take some time to think about what you want in this relationship and be honest with yourself. I think it would be good to be honest with your girlfriend by talking with her if you feel like you're carrying all the weight in the relationship before you decide to break up with her.
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