Still live with my parents, play lots of video games and watches a lot of movies.
I do go out from time to time, to parties and kick backs and drink with my friends. But I still struggle and still get nervous around girls I find attractive. I'm also trying to get a BA in history and a teaching credential. Oh and I also have Adhd.
Nothing is wrong with you. Actually, I REALLY like a guy who's a lot like you. Except he's almost 22.
You'll find a girl one day that will be patient with you, that will be able to gradually bring you out of that shell. I'm sure it doesn't help having friends that party and drink - sure you do that with them, but I'm gonna take a guess and say that most of them can count on more than one hand how many women they've been with or liked. Just don't let that stump you. Realize that when you DO meet a woman that has the ability to bring your guard down, she won't just be a dime a dozen like the rest. She'll be special.
The thing is, you obviously aren't anti-social. It's just that time keeps building on itself and you're psyching yourself out more and more that you're 25 and have yet to experience a relationship and all the goodness that comes with it.
But I promise - it WILL happen when it's supposed to. Nothing is wrong with you, you're just one of those guys who are meant to meet "the one" girl that will change your life.
Geez, you girls are making me blush here, lol. And wow, you pretty much have my friends down pretty well. My best friend, I know has also not been in a serious relationship. I'm not sure if he's a virgin or not, and actually sometimes I wonder if he's gay >.>. But as for my other friends. One is actually with a girl right now, but before her, there's been about 3 others I think. I got another friend who's had way more girl friends than I can remember and even had a kid with one (continue next..) - A month ago
Question Asker
(brutal breakup with that one too). He's probably the only one out of most of our buddies who's had the best luck with women (getting into a relationship with them that is). Also this is not to say I have not tried in the past neither. There was this one girl in high school ill never forget. Had a crush on her, wrote her a letter before graduation, haven't heard from her since. Another one from my job that ended up being a druggy (cocaine, the mother of them all). *sigh* - A month ago
Question Asker
Sorry, don't mean to make this long, but just to finish. There were a few other girls I had crushes on, but that's all they really were, crushes. Maybe I'm just too darned afraid of being hurt. I really don't know how well I could handle being cheated on if that were too happen. Maybe I keep looking too far into things and as a result feel akward and shy. I dunno, but thanks for the comment. I might come back here every now and then and read it again jic. :-D - A month ago
If you don't ask any girls out, you won't go on any dates. Don't wait for them to come up to you, because most girls won't. Start out small. Just talking to a girl doesn't mean you are hitting on them not to us anyways.
As for the other stuff, like parents/adhd/videos/movies, there is nothing wrong with any of that stuff. Hopefully, you don't plan on living with your parents forever though.
Why don't you stop looking for girls who are "attractive" and find one who has some dignity plus morals?
She could be attractive but very VERY ugly in the inside. You need to be cery cautious. You never having a girlfriend looking for just an appearance is just.retarded and shallow. You need to look into getting to know someone first start out as friends. The fact you get so nervous it is better for you to enter a relationship by beginning a friendship first.
If you go out with someone you don't even know that's really stupid too because why would you be with someone you don't even know?
um first off I think you need to change a few things like playing video games and watching movies so often my ex is like that and I completely hated it after a while,secondly unless you have a really big house like one where you can be home and not see your parents for the day then you should move out as soon as possible if not in a small apartment a roommate would be even better than your parents.and you don't have to not be a virin for girls to date you also try going out by yourself to scope out girls don't wait till you're with your friends and don't be nervous you never kno what a girl could like unless you try
For one I do believe anyone can make an honest opinion about you with the little bit of information that you have given. In my opinion one can not make an honest opinion about someone without knowing more about a person. From reading what you posted I can tell that you a deciated, hardworking individual. As far as the video games goes in my personsal experience not to many girls are into video games so in some situations this may be a turn off for some women. However, that doesn't mean you have to quit playing them just maybe try to get out more. Your not going to met anyone sitting at home playing video games and watch movies alone. You a single 25 year old guy.get out and have fun! However I can say I know two other guys that are quite similar to you. One is 25, has had girlfriends, is not avirgin, he has at least 5 girls wanting to be with him and yet he sits at home with his computer, games, dog, and does nothing . He doesn't drinking so going out for him is a big problem. He is way mature then most of his friends and he doesn't feel as if he fits in. The other guy is 30 and is a virgin and does the same.sits at home games, computer, and movies. They are both attractive but for some reason unknown to me those qualities just do not turn a girl on unless she is also into them. So.as for the talking to girls! That's something you will need to get over if you ever want to met a decent girl. Many girls will not walk up to a guy and start talking they feel its the guys duty to appoarch them. Do not think of how pretty she is or how is may not be interested? do think how she will response to you? She talk to her as if she was a friend, family member.and just start a general converstion. Hello, How are you? do yo you live around here? Where do you work? What brings you out tonight? Thinks like that are great conversation starters.GOOD LUCK and let me know if you need more advice
You are shy around women. I think sometime in the past you became less and less proactive about meeting women. You became more involved with games, movies and your friends, which made you a little rusty when dealing with the opposite sex. You want a girlfriend but are unsure how to get one.
Nah, I was always really involved with games and I've always been pretty shy around women I find attractive. I've just recently started picking up a few pointers here and there though. I might actually hit up a bar some day and just work on my social skills. So hopefully something will change. But its pretty much been stagnant as far as my luck with girls up to now. - A month ago
Answerer
Darn, guess I better quit my psychic job! lol - A month ago
How old are you? It depends on how old you are, but you seem like a pretty cool guy, and someone who I would be interested in (not coming on to you, just being honest). But ya you sound like a normal guy, why are you still a virgin?
I'm 25. And its actually quite a long story as to why I'm still a virgin, but as of right now I just wanna save it for that special someone. It use to bug me a lot (still does from time to time, but not as much as before), and I sometimes had this feeling that everyone around me was having sex and I wasn't. I'm very glad I grew out of that, cause that was just a spiraling nightmare for me. Thanks for the comment. This site's great, I can finally ask questions and not feel nervous asking them. ^^ - A month ago
Answerer
OMG, me too! I am still a virgin, however I am only 19, but that is the same exact reason. I mean ya that would be cool if I could wait as long as marriage, but as long as I fall in love I would give it to that special person. And yes I am VERY self conscious about it. EVERYONE I know has had sex I swear. It's soo annoying, what happened to morals?? I do understand how a lot of the people I know were in serious relationships first which is great, but I just feel immature when the topic comes up. - A month ago
I do agree. I think you should probably get out more & don't be nervous around girls you think are cute! Why be nervous, it's just a girl! That is awesome you are in school trying to better yourself. You said you play lots of video games, I mean, are you obsessive about it or what? Would you rather spend time playing video games than going out with your friends? If that is the case, you just need to say "yes" to your friends more and "no" to playing video games more. Don't quit playing them, that's not what I'm saying at all (I myself am a video game junkie!), but do try to be more social and less of a hermit.
The whole girl thing, what really makes you nervous. Is it the fact you might say or do something embarrassing or is it you just don't know how to strike up a conversation with them, etc.?
Overall (with this limited amount of details), you sound like a good guy. You come off to me as the shy type, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. Oh yeah, and who cares you're a virgin. That shouldn't matter.
I don't know why I get so nervous, its like my mind just melts into mush and all I can see is failure when I try to get the nerve to talk to a girl I like. However, I find that I do ok when I'm the one who's been talked too. I feel a bit more confident for some reason. I am trying though, I just wish I had someone around to remind me of how awesome I am every time I'm shot down. I gotta say though it takes tremendous courage for me to actually try. But again I'm trying to work on it. - A month ago
Answerer
At least you're working on it. Try to picture it this way, Seriously, what is the worst that is gonna happen? She might say no. Ok, then move on to the next girl. Think of it like a McDonald's drive thru worker, you ask if the customer want fries, they say no, then you move on to the next customer and ask the same thing! Who cares if you get shot down, everyone does at some point! The more nos you get, the closer you are to a yes and the more self confidence you'll build! - A month ago
I think you should get out of your parents house,I love video games and you can't go wrong with movies. I think you sound like a guy who is very ambitious and shouldn't let the fact that you're still a virgin prevent you from being nervous or getting girls. And that is my god honest opinion about you ;*) good luck!
-Practice making small talk with everyone, not only attractive girls. Talk to bank tellers, supermarket clerks, classmates and teachers; talk to the old and the young, male and female, all races and all jobs. The more you make small talk with people, the more comfortable you'll get at it, so you won't freeze up when you have a chance with a cute girl.
-After a month of making small talk with strangers, set a goal of asking out one girl a week. If you're not accustomed to doing this, it will feel like a big step. But the more you do it the easier it gets, I promise. If you're afraid of rejection you'll learn that getting turned down is not so terrible. And if you set a goal and commit to it, you're far more likely to do it than if you tell yourself that you'll "someday" get more assertive.
-Cut down on the video games. There's nothing wrong with video games, but they can too easily suck you in and devour all your time. I'd suggest the same to anyone who devoted a lot of time to a solitary activity. Cut back on the video games, but replace them with a group activity; like another answer said cooking classes are a great way to meet women.
(Age:25 to 29)
When: A month ago
(Age:18 to 24)
When: A month ago
